TheBakersfieldCalifornian.com

They were high school sweethearts. Phil and Zoe. Everyone referred to them in the plural.

Just 18, born about three weeks apart, they were already talking about getting married after college, starting a family, sharing their lives together. Forever.

Then on Saturday the unthinkable happened.

Philip Dhanens, a smart, athletic Garces High grad who was just beginning his college experience at Fresno State University, was taken to a local hospital after what university officials described as a night of heavy drinking at an off-campus Theta Chi fraternity house.

Then on Sunday, a short but shocking email went out to the entire Garces community from Garces President John Fanucchi:

"This morning, Philip Dhanens, Class of 2012, passed away surrounded by his family. Please keep the Dhanens family in your prayers."

Fresno State immediately suspended recognition of Theta Chi fraternity as soon as the incident came to light Saturday. The fraternity's international organization also issued a statement expressing condolences to the Dhanens family and pledging its own investigation.

"Theta Chi Fraternity has a strict anti-hazing policy, and strict guidelines for chapters which prohibit underage alcohol consumption," the organization said in the statement. "Theta Chi Fraternity has dispatched senior representatives of our international organization to Fresno to assess the situation. The fraternity intends to fully cooperate with local authorities and the administration of California State University, Fresno to find out exactly what happened, and to determine what course of action to take next with respect to the local chapter."

The Fresno Police Department is investigating the circumstances of Dhanens' death, although police officials have not responded to calls for more details.

And in the midst of the chaos, questions and calls for investigations, the young woman who dated the 320-pound defensive lineman for the Garces Rams is, in a word, devastated.

Zoe Tucker, who now wears Dhanens' Garces class ring on a chain around her neck, is left wondering how such a thing could happen and how the bright future she envisioned for herself and for the young man she loved could so suddenly and senselessly disappear.

"We knew after our first year together that we wanted to be together forever," Tucker said at her family's home in northeast Bakersfield.

"We began seeing each other early in our sophomore year," she recalled. "It would have been three years on the 14th of September."

Even as she spoke of her boyfriend with affection and tenderness, at times her eyes would seem to focus on something far in the distance.

"He was one of the funniest guys I've ever met," she said. "He was able to make anybody laugh or smile.

"He was smart -- and he was so caring. He had the biggest heart, and he was super sensitive."

The way he died doesn't make sense, she said.

"On Saturday nights, we'd watch TV or play cards," Tucker said. Drinking was not a big part of his life.

Zoe's mom, Sandy Tucker, was equally puzzled by the reports of heavy drinking.

"Phil is not a party drinker," said Mrs. Tucker.

While she acknowledged she had some concerns when her daughter established a long-term relationship so early in high school, the way Dhanens treated Zoe -- and everyone he knew -- gave her peace of mind.

He has never given me a day of worry," she said. "Of course, he was raised by his parents, the most wonderful people you'd ever want to meet."

Adolfo Robles, who graduated last spring with Zoe and Philip, said he has considered Dhanens his best friend since the eighth grade.

"It was crushing," Robles said of learning about his friend's death. "I really don't have words."

Despite Dhanens' 6-foot 5-inch frame, he was really a "big softy," Robles said. "In my eyes, he could do no wrong."

Robles, who is away at college in Montana, recalled the time Zoe gave the big defensive lineman a tiny kitten for his birthday.

A lot of macho football players would have been embarrassed or put off by such a gift. Not Dhanens.

"He named that kitten and took care of it like it was his child," Robles said. "He always had it with him."

It said a lot about his character.

When Zoe learned less than a week ago that Philip was planning to pledge to a fraternity, she admitted it gave her pause.

"I was a little worried, but I knew I could trust him," she said. "I told him, 'Just be careful.'

"He was so excited. The guys really liked him," she said of the members of the fraternity.

"On Saturday, I was supposed to go down to a football game (in Fresno) and meet his friends," she said. "I was looking forward to that."

Now, so much of what she's been looking forward to is gone.

Robles said he hasn't yet come to terms with his friend's death. But if there's a lesson to be learned it's to know your limits if you choose to drink.

"But I strongly recommend that you don't do it at all," he said, speaking to his underage peers.

"There's a reason the drinking age is 21."